Fact: Men Irritate Women!

Fact: Men irritate women!
By Adeel Ansari (@Adeel_Ansari)

There comes a time in every man’s life when he irritates the hell out of women and honestly we know it, we just act like we don't. Growing up, I remember teasing the girl I liked the most in school only to get her to notice me. So perhaps it’s continued to be part of our DNA as we’ve grown up.
Having been married now for sometime, I’ve been able to pin point a few areas where we, men, have mastered the art of irritation.


1. The Toilet Seat Conundrum
We don’t know why we do this but we do, no matter how many times you tell us to put the toilet seat down, we will leave it up. I guess your constant nagging gives us the satisfaction that we’ve been able to get under your skin… so by that logic if you stop to get irritated by it, we may just put it down one day. Think about that.

2. The dichotomy of the long life Pajamas
I don’t understand why women want us to change our pajamas every second day, even when they don’t smell foul (and you hate it when we check it for bad odor).
I say if it doesn’t stink, it’s not dead and doesn’t need to be changed. So why not leave us be with our pajamas that don’t require washing for 2weeks. Think of it this way, we’re saving on water, time and effort. In that sense, we’re helping you save your time. We choose to wear pajamas for two weeks because we love you.

3. The tooth brushing on holidays Juxtaposition
It’s my day off and I want to be lazy. At least I gurgle and use a mouthwash (sometimes) then why all the fuss?! By definition, us men were born to live as bums only so that you women have a project to work on for the rest of your lives. If we were perfect who would you nag?

4. Short version syndrome
Woman even if you were a bestselling author I would still want to hear the summary of your day and not a minute by minute account. I read somewhere that women on average speak 8000 words a day while men only speak about 3000, it’s probably because you don’t let us talk.

5. The weekend “what to do” paradox
So I spend close to 50hrs a week working and on the weekend I need to have my time with the boys to relax. But somehow you women are always thinking “what do WE do over the weekend” as a couple while us men are thinking “what do I do over the weekend” with the boys. Granted we can be selfish but then again you get your time with the girls during the week don’t you, so when do I get my time with the boys?

6. The quick shopping fixation
Send men/boys into a gadget store and we’ll spend hours, but we’ll be playing with the products NOT taking time thinking of what to get. Men have been programmed to take quick decisions and we pride ourselves in that. We cannot and will not be able to spend hours with you in a mall, looking at clothes you want to buy, jewelry you wished we had bought you or the furniture that would make our home stand out. If you want to buy something please know what it is before you enter the store. It helps if you follow the list you’ve made before leaving the home, which you tend to forget when in the store.

7. The baby’s sick complex of men
When women are sick, they take it quite well. They’re able to manage their sickness in a profound fashion and get back on their feet really quickly. However when we get sick, it’s like the end of the world for us, doesn’t matter if it’s a cold or a car crash, our response is always going to be a brush with death that requires extra care sprinkled with a dose of over dramatization. Nevertheless, it gets us the attention we so crave.

Image credit: http://www.ontariofamilylawblog.com/articles/emotional-journey/
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